Recalculating
It’s been an interesting start in Tennessee to say the least and I will never stop thanking everyone who’s been supporting us. It’s going to take us a while to fully be “done” with the fire stuff (when have insurance matters ever been completed rapidly?) but we’re starting to feel a little more like ourselves in the past few days.
I’m physically less inflamed. It’s amazing what stress does to you. I’m starting to look like myself again. My workouts are feeling better (no crying on the treadmill this week!) and my connection with my internal voice is starting to come back. I have missed that!
There is something awesome about knowing that you’re actions are in line with your intentions and that you’re making the right choices for yourself and others in a given situation. There have been some horrible days of fog where I legitimately worried if the choices that I were making were correct and had my internal compass just spun wildly. Oof, that was terrible. But I appreciate that internal vision so much more now.
I’m starting to settle back into the betterment routines that I had let fall away due to my lack of head space and stress. Specifically journaling, workout analysis, daily meditation, daily writing (and that pesky household expenses spreadsheet)! I’m feeling more organized and more in control than I have since the fire. My little ducks may not all be in a row, but at least they’re in the same area of the pond. Hell, at least they’re in the same pond!
We’re car owners now, which was a stressful necessity on top of everything else. I was totally grumpy about getting a car. I didn’t want one, was afraid of spending the money, but I knew we needed one and we had set some money aside when we started making plans. I was unimpressed with the majority of the cars in our budget (I want a hybrid, but it’s not in the finances currently) but I knew this was something that needed to be done, so we went out on the lot and started sitting in cars. Dean was enjoying an in depth conversation about video games with our salesman when I sat in this ridiculously bright green, obnoxious car and somehow began bonding with the little beast. I insisted on checking out several other cars anyway, but Lucky won out and we brought him home. (He is Lucky because he is shamrock green and because I felt that we needed some luck.)
Things are starting to make sense more at work and I’m starting to get inspired to throw my own creativity at it. I feel challenged and mentored and I’m enjoying it. I’m still experiencing some challenges (especially with getting emails and calls when I’m not at work) but that’s part of being in a management position. I’ve started to network with a few other places that I’d like to teach, but I’m trying not to stress and I’m trying not to push. I still have two certifications in progress as it is. A light schedule may be what I need right now.
Dean has been making progress too. We’ve both been networking, it takes a little longer, but I’m starting to relax into the southern speed again. Dean has had some really good news, but I’m going to let him be the first to share it online. Maybe next entry I’ll get to elaborate!
We’re starting to piece our home together. Both with things we’ve been able to purchase with the help of our friends and things that they cleaned after the fire. Some things are frustratingly damaged, but we’ve decided to use everything usable until we’ve got our feet firmly beneath us. Hopefully we’ll get adequate compensation. We’re making it ours.
I’m starting to enjoy our new place more and mourn the loss of the old place less often. Jake has perked up also and we have made comfy spots for him. He enjoys running up and down the stairs and is happy with some of the fun things our friends have sent him.
We’re becoming the Lyvers again. We can’t wait for you to see us.