At my first (socially distanced, during 2020) Nashville Sounds game.

The very publicly covered romance between Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce was really not anything I cared about. Until I noticed that the way Swift was received really put a spotlight on how women in general are treated when they express a mild interest in sports.

For clarification purposes: I do not consider myself a Swiftie. I think Taylor Swift is very talented, and hardworking, and I generally like her songs when I hear them, but I definitely don’t know which ones are from which album and they very rarely make their way onto my playlists. I do have a few favorites though, and I would never begrudge any woman her well-earned success. (Do I wish she would look into her private jet usage due to climate change? Yes, but that’s not the focus today.)

In the spirit of continued clarification: I consider myself a casual sports fan. I prefer playing sports to watching them, but I can definitely get into games when they are on. I even have a few favorite teams: The Saints (I grew up in New Orleans, I’m indoctrinated), LSU, the Bears, the White Sox, the Blackhawks, the Predators, the Nashville Sounds. Can I tell you who is currently on the roster? No. Do I have a few shirts and hats? Yeah. Yeah, I do. Would I go to a game if you invited me? Absolutely.

Now that that’s been established, let’s get into it.

Christmas 2016. My friend Charles got me all Saints gear for our Friendmas. I still have that hat. I love it.

People have actually shouted “you’re ruining football” to Taylor Swift as she’s walked through stadiums. All the woman wants to do is support her boyfriend, drink with her new friends, and have fun. Yeah, she happens to be famous. And you what that’s done so far?

This past Super Bowl (apparently it was LVIII) was watched by 58.8 million women. The highest number ever and an increase of nine percent from the previous year. Let’s also throw in that the increase in total viewership was only seven percent.

Taylor Swift has been seen befriending Brittany Mahomes, Kristin Juszczyk, and other ladies. She’s gotten shade for befriending Brittany, but after they both wore Kristin Juszcyk’s custom jackets to a game, Juszczyk, who has been making very cool NFL themed custom clothes for a while, finally got a licensing deal.

I love when women lift other women up.

The guff for befriending Mahomes is apparently because a lot of football fans ‘hate’ her. Personally, I like that she made her own decision and didn’t worry about what people thought or how being friends with Mahomes might affect her ‘brand.’

But let's pull back a little wider.

Two people in this picture are Cubs fans. But they went with us to a Sox game because it was fun. And no, it wasn’t a Crosstown Classic game.

As I mentioned before, I am mildly interested in sports. I’m an athletic, competitive person, so they appeal to me. I also like comradery, so rooting for a team alongside others is fun. However, I don’t care to delve into statistics. I don’t want the outcome of a sports ball game to affect my mood for a week, day, or even an hour, so I’ve never waded so deep.

My first memories of my childhood bedroom include a New Orleans Saints pennant on my bulletin board. I certainly don’t remember placing it there. But I do remember that my dad was very into the Saints when I was growing up. I remember as a kid asking, “who are the good guys?” when I caught him watching a game if the Saints weren’t on the screen. (I knew what the Saints uniforms looked like.)

I went to my first game when I was twelve. They were 8 - 0 at the time, which I remember because when I was young, the Saints were terrible. People called them the Ain’ts and would wear paper bags on their heads when they went to games. I remember that they lost that game, but I mostly remember that it was fun going to a football game with my dad. I got to go to the famed SuperDome!

All of that made it ‘okay’ in the eyes of the sports gatekeepers for me to claim the Saints as my team even though I was hazy on who played what position. The gatekeepers were also mollified by the fact that I played tackle football with my friends when I was in high school. We’ll get back to this.

Let’s talk about adulthood.

When I moved to Chicago, I was asked what my baseball team was. New Orleans doesn’t have a major league team, so I was told I needed to pick between the White Sox and the Cubs, and no, I absolutely could not support both.

Well, when in Rome…

I chose the White Sox for a few reasons. 1. I had been to a game during a company outing where they got us a box. (This was before they had won the series and I’m positive that the reasons were financial.) 2. I liked the uniforms better. 3. And most importantly: the Cubs fans were severely irritating whenever I was on the el during game season. And I don’t know how much you know about baseball—no judgment either way—but it’s MOST of the year.

You don’t have to root for the same team to enjoy the game.

Now. A few years into my Chicago residency, I started dating a guy. He was a piece of work. Let’s just say I based a character in Ghost Tamer on him and everyone hates that dude. But he and his friends were from Michigan and super into Notre Dame football. (I don’t know why, none of them went there.) And they were all into the Cubs. I had chosen the Sox and stood by that choice. Instead of enjoying a friendly rivalry, they decided to test me and declared I wasn’t a “real fan.”

At one point, when we were alone, I sarcastically told my boyfriend that I could get flashcards and memorize every player and position on the White Sox team as well as their stats before the next game if that would make me a ‘real fan.’ He was quiet for a second but then said, “If you did that, I think my friends would actually be impressed and it would be pretty cool.”

Oh, so I could cram my way into real fandom? Note to all the ladies out there, apparently, if you’re going to choose a sports ball team, do your flashcards before you show up. (Or don’t and just have a beer/wine/mimosa/whatever, root for your team, and fuck those guys.)

Does anyone remember when Victoria Beckham would take the Spice Girls to games to watch David, drink champagne, and just hang out? And how they were villainized for it? Victoria even said how she wasn’t into football before David, and she wasn’t into it after David. She just wanted to go to the game, support her partner, and have fun with her friends.

And who the hell cares?

And before any Dads, Brads, and Chads come at me for how they ‘disrupt things’ with their fame or whatever, let’s just talk about normal drunk assholes at sports ball events. Let’s talk about any game involving Philadelphia ever. D Batteries anyone?

I have a lot of guy friends. An informal poll has produced these results: 0 out of a jillion penis-having people are made to prove their legitimacy when they claim to support a certain team.

And I do know women who are super into sports. One of my friends has a podcast called Peace, Love, and Baseball that she records from actual Cardinals stadium seats that she owns. My best friend, Natasha, who I’ve known since I was ten, is a Saints superfan. She gets riled up on game day and has several jerseys and even a light-up Saints sweater. Neither of them has ever done any gatekeeping in my experience, other than perhaps questions about which teams I like and if I’m watching a certain game. I think they would be thrilled to bring me along to their sport and happily explain anything I had questions about or just let me hang, cheer when the team scored, and drink my beverage of choice.

Taylor Swift, who was never super interested in football before, has now said she was ‘missing out.’ Fortunately, she’s the most famous person in the world, so she doesn’t give a shit when people go after her for not being a fan since birth, or at the very least not looking like she plays tackle football with the dudes on the weekends.

Basically, it boils down to this: women who have a mild interest in sports are often bullied away when they express said interest because they haven't supported a team since before they could walk, or don't know enough about the players, or maybe just want to hang out with their friends and have fun while they cheer on their local, and thus never get deeper into the sport. And that it's detrimental to sports as a whole.

There he is! I have circled him in blue. None of the cosplayers yelled that I was not supposed to be there.

To be clear, I think it’s great if you’re super into a team and make it your entire nerd fandom thing. My husband knows everything about Final Fantasy. All the stats on all the players, what they can do, when it’s best to put them on the field, etc. That’s cool. I don’t care to get that into it, but I’m happy that he enjoys it so much.

Your sports obsession is very similar to me. Except, admittedly, I can’t go watch Final Fantasy live. (However, I have seen my husband sing the music in the Distant Worlds Philharmonic Choir at Orchestra Hall on Michigan Avenue. He got paid $600. And I totally went to cheer him on. And enjoyed the hell out of it. And still know just about the same about the video game as I did before.)

But also, why is it so bad if a woman wants to get together with her friends to watch a game and support someone on the team? Do we have to know who is assigned to what number and who is injured and on and on to enjoy a game? It’s a game for heaven’s sake.

It’s supposed to be fun. I think.

How Taylor Swift's romance highlighted the treatment of women sports fans.